Okay, you can stop wondering "OMG, where's the Top 5 list post?! Did I miss it?!!!" You didn't miss it, because it's here. Don't panic. It's all going to be okay. So, do what I'm doing -- relax, take off your bra, pour yourself a glass of Drambuie, and settle in for the post you've been waiting ALL. YEAR. FOR.
Okay, my sweeties, what does my Top 5 List look like for 2015? Well, it looks... different. You gotta mix it up once in a while. Keep these hotties on their toes.
Now, I know my readers are not only drop-dead gorgeous but also incredibly intelligent, so I'm sure y'all KNOW this is all in fun. I don't call my dudes "pretend boyfriends" for nothing. Pure fantasy, people.
If you're new here, I have guidelines I use when making my list. You may want to follow them too...
1: Stick to 5. Any more would be greedy, and I'm all about the sharing.
2: Keep it to current humans -- as in alive and at their present age. You shouldn't need a time machine to do the nasty with them. Do you hear me, Sylvia?!
3: Speaking of "the nasty", THAT'S ALL THIS IS ABOUT. No relationships. Nothing serious. Think a hot holiday weekend, a steamy night in a hotel, even a 5-minute sexy quickie in the alley.
4: Again, this is all in fun. You cannot use "Nenette said it was okay" as your defence when you get arrested for breaking into Ian Somerhalder, Rhianna, or David Hasselhoff's house. I did not say it was okay. I love y'all but you're on your own.
5: Think long and hard about this! This is your list FOR THE YEAR. Pretend it's laminated.
When you have your list, drop it in the comments here on or on my Facebook page.
Need ideas? Check out previous years' posts: 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014.
Now, without further ado, here's my Top 5 List for 2015:
1: Victor Webster
Tall, dark, and handsome man who practices martial arts. My basic dream come true. He just needs an accent. Scottish, Australian,... or even EK. I'm not picky. He was cute in Charmed, but holy crap, now? OMG. He's older, more distinguished, yet rather playful still. Yeah, I follow him on Social Media.
If anyone on this list smells like sandalwood, I'm sure it's this guy. Yes, it's important.
2: Anson Mount
Where has this dude been hiding all my life?! It's all good -- he's here now. He runs the risk of looking too handsome (yes, that's a thing), but as long as he keeps his hair long and face scruffy, he'll be just fine. VERY FINE. I don't think I've ever seen him act. No worries. I'll look for a few episodes of "Hell on Wheels" later... when I stop drooling.
3: Gerard Butler
OMG, what's he doing at #3?! Yeah, Victor and Anson just blew me away. Maybe I'm changing. I don't know. Gerry's still cute. Still funny. And still scruffy. I'm still a sucker for that accent.
4: Benedict Cumberbatch
My girlfriend Stace said he's her "chocolate tequila". She is one of my smartest friends.
5: John Stamos
I think he made the same deal with the devil that Elle McPherson did. Hottie. It wasn't until I started following him on Instagram that I realized just how funny this guy is. And THAT'S what got me first. The key to my panties is to make me laugh. Apparently.
Okay, now you -- and go!!!